Saturday, May 9, 2009

Great Novels Of The 21st Century That Will Never Be Finished: "Les Photographique"

"Great Novels Of The 21st Century That Will Never Be Finished" is a continuing series in a new genre that promises to kill dead the Western literary tradition.

"It was easier during the famine," Felix mused.

Copyright © 2009 by S. Ridgway Thornton

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Friday, March 27, 2009

Great Novels Of The 21st Century That Will Never Be Finished: "Dead Man In The Cockpit"

"Great Novels Of The 21st Century That Will Never Be Finished" is a continuing series in a new genre that promises to kill dead the Western literary tradition.

One of the advantages of being a writer is that you can go to work drunk," reflected Austen Pillory as he stumbled into his den/office, tripped over Fiddlesticks, his ancient cocker spaniel, and banged his head against the edge of his vintage, 1950's Army surplus desk.

When he awoke groggily the next morning, head pounding, eyelids glued together, dry mouth tasting of sewer, Pillory didn't immediately see the man slumped in the ergonomic swivel chair with a knife protruding from his back, face down on the computer keyboard of Pillory's writing work station, which he thought of proprietorially as "the cockpit" as if, instead of a humble writer, he was the valiant pilot of a World War II Spitfire weaving through an enemy squadron, creating a bold new literary genre for the 21st Century.

Copyright © 2009 by S. Ridgway Thornton

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Friday, January 23, 2009

Miracle In Washington: Republicans Magically Turn Economy Completely Around. Wow!

Image of of NRCC page on 1/24/2009
Confounding the experts, somehow the National Republican Congressional Committee has turned the economy around on a dime, from moribund to spectacularly successful. Here's how they explain it:
Economy
Thanks to Republican economic policies, the U.S. economy is robust and job creation is strong.

Republican tax cuts are creating jobs and continuing to strengthen the economy, yet there is still more to do so that every American who wants a job can find one. Congressional Republicans understand that many Americans are working hard to make ends meet. That is why the GOP continues to push for pro-growth policies that create jobs and oppose tax increases that would add a burden to working families and set back our economy. Republicans believe we should:

  • Allow families to plan for the future by making tax relief permanent.
  • Encourage investment and expansion by restraining federal spending and reducing regulation.
  • Make our country less dependent on foreign sources of energy through a comprehensive national energy policy.
  • Expand trade and levels the playing field to sell American goods and services across the globe.
  • Protect small business owners and workers from excessive frivolous lawsuits that threaten jobs across America.
  • Lower the cost of health care for small businesses and working families through Association Health Plans, tax-free Health Savings Accounts, tax credits for employer contributions to Health Savings Accounts, Medical Liability Reform, and health information technology.

Additionally, to keep our economy growing, we must reform the tax code to make it simpler, fairer, and more pro-growth. Embarking on a bipartisan effort to reform and simplify the tax code is one of the goals of the Republicans in Congress.

The only puzzling aspect to this story is how The Onion missed it.

 

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Bill O'Reilly School for Reasonable Journalism™: First Graduate Is A Winner!!!

Warning!!!
If you are a little bitty kid, listening to the below video may possibly make your ears and nose drop clean off, thereby disfiguring you for life. You should immediately go back to that porn site you were exploring.


Responsible adults may now view the below video of the first graduate of the Bill O'Reilly School for Reasonable Journalism™.


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