Miracle In Washington: Republicans Magically Turn Economy Completely Around. Wow!

Image of of NRCC page on 1/24/2009

Confounding the experts, somehow the National Republican Congressional Committee has turned the economy around on a dime, from moribund to spectacularly successful. Here's how they explain it:

Economy

Thanks to Republican economic policies, the U.S. economy is robust and job creation is strong.

Republican tax cuts are creating jobs and continuing to strengthen the economy, yet there is still more to do so that every American who wants a job can find one. Congressional Republicans understand that many Americans are working hard to make ends meet. That is why the GOP continues to push for pro-growth policies that create jobs and oppose tax increases that would add a burden to working families and set back our economy. Republicans believe we should:

• Allow families to plan for the future by making tax relief permanent.
• Encourage investment and expansion by restraining federal spending and reducing regulation.
• Make our country less dependent on foreign sources of energy through a comprehensive national energy policy.
• Expand trade and levels the playing field to sell American goods and services across the globe.
• Protect small business owners and workers from excessive frivolous lawsuits that threaten jobs across America.
• Lower the cost of health care for small businesses and working families through Association Health Plans, tax-free Health Savings Accounts, tax credits for employer contributions to Health Savings Accounts, Medical Liability Reform, and health information technology.

Additionally, to keep our economy growing, we must reform the tax code to make it simpler, fairer, and more pro-growth. Embarking on a bipartisan effort to reform and simplify the tax code is one of the goals of the Republicans in Congress.

The only puzzling aspect to this story is how The Onion missed it.